Finding Motivation

"Sorry folks, the only reason you'll see me running is if I happen to be chasing an ice cream truck" - Lori Maurer

I'm pretty sure I'm plagiarizing someone else with that quote, but I googled for hours (okay about 2 minutes) and couldn't find the actual quote anywhere.....so I stole it. And the fact is I used to say exactly that to my co-workers every time they tried suckering me into running with them on "the trail" behind work. But no matter how many times they begged, pleaded, and bribed me with chocolate it just wouldn't work. At the time I just didn't have the motivation or the desire to run.....or exercise. But then over the holidays I hit my highest weight ever. Now here's where this blog gets tricky. I promised myself if I did a blog, I'd be dead honest otherwise it wasn't going to be useful to me...or anyone else. So here goes....I weighed 192 pounds on a frame of 5'3"....FINE....5'2". Geeze.

That's a lot. I was almost a "deuce". THAT could not possibly be happening. Being a deuce is motivation. In my mind, being a deuce was simply not acceptable. I'm not really sure why weighing 185 was okay, but 192 wasn't. It's really not that different, but there was something about 200 that was looming WAY too close.

So I decided to run.....in January. Brrrrr.... The first time I ran a mile, I seriously thought I was going to die. It took me over 16 minutes and I had to walk. And, unfortunately, I hadn't begun the effective habit of positive self talk. I was immersing myself in negative, self hating, destroy yourself talk. Not good. Even so, the result was I got outside and ran/walked for a mile. While I wasn't exactly hyped about doing a run/walk of only one mile in over 16 minutes, I figured I'd still post it on facebook for some moral support. Smart idea on my end. My cool facebook friends were completely supportive and helpful. VERY motivating.

Shortly after that I ran my first 5k in Charlotte, NC with my friend Patty and my husband Aaron cheering me on. My time was 43 minutes plus. I was so excited about being able to finish without stopping to walk, I signed up for another one. I ran in Salisbury and my time was OK. But I was hooked...so I signed up for ANOTHER 5k....and then another 5k!!! Well, apparently after the 3rd 5k, I wasn't as motivated. I didn't run for almost three weeks before the run, and it was HORRIBLE. I ran it in something like 47 mintes. Stupid honesty...okay it was probably more like 57 minutes. Maybe. I'm really not sure.

Once again, I was at a crossroads. I either needed to step it up a notch and do this thing, or I needed to be comfortable and positive about being nearly a deuce. By the way - I forgot to mention that between January and May of 2011 I lost more than 12 pounds just with running. Pretty awesome huh? BUT! I needed a better motivation. Something outside myself to motivate me, so I crossed my "crossroads" on Friday. I signed up for a half marathon. But not just any half marathon! I signed up with Team in Training. TNT is a group program where you are assigned a coach and run as a team to help fight Lymphoma and Leukemia. Cancer has affected my life by hitting so many of the people I love. Lymphoma specifically recently hit Alex, the brother of a good friend of mine. I've decided that I'll not only be running for our sponsor - who I'll write more about later - but specifically for Alex.

I have my big kick off meeting tomorrow night at Fuel Pizza. Again, this blog calls for honesty, so here goes. Who the HECK has a kick off party for a group of runners at a PIZZA JOINT??? That's like taking a bunch of recovering alcholics to the ABC store for an informational session on what alcohol does to your liver. Running? I'm going to be focused on the PIZZA BABY! Anyway, I'm sure they are wise beyond my years and know what they are doing. Did I mention they'll be supplying free pizza? Yup..."here Mr. Alcoholic, while you're waiting for Dr. Stupid to explain that the liver you have looks like a dried up prune and is totally useless to you, have a vodka tonic". Geeze Louise.

Anyway, I honestly believe this organization is the real deal, and I have a lot of faith in what they can teach me (no seriously) and I believe they can get me to the point where I'm ready to run a half marathon. I'm scared, I'm nervous and I'm pretty sure I'm going to literally pee myself somewhere on this journey, but I'm doing it anyway.

Dont' bother fixing my grammar or my spelling, but PLEASE help me stay motivated. Post some trash talk, encouragement or good humored swift kicks in the rear!!! I need the motivation...BELIEVE ME!